I don’t know what is wrong with me.  I mean, I KNOW what is wrong with me, there are too many things to mention.  What I mean is, why do I watch so much Food Network TV when I am constantly complaining about it?  My BFF Ina is back with a new show, and as you can see from the above picture I tried her white chocolate thingie.  While I do love Ina, and in fact, own four of her cookbooks, I must admit that she doesn’t live in the real world.  I suppose if we all lived in the Hamptons and formerly owned our own business and didn’t have children and on and on and on we would be able to afford 3 pounds of lobster or 2 pounds of fresh shrimp or whatever insane ingredient that we can only wish for.  But, most of us don’t have that type of money.  Well, at least I don’t.

So even though I enjoy her (except for the end of the program when she has her guests around and she has that annoying cackle of a laugh) I find many of her recipes too pricey to try.  Don’t get me started on Sandra Lee.  I would have to mortgage my house to do her tablescapes.  For heaven’s sake woman, they are hideous.  A nice tablecloth and a bouquet of flowers is better.  And I can’t discuss Giada’s cleavage anymore.  Paul says I am obsessed with it.  Why does this woman dress like a hooker?  Why oh why can’t she wear a turtleneck on occasion?  I am fixated on her “girls.”  I can barely watch what she makes because her boobs get in the way.  So, I have stopped watching her.  Perhaps I need therapy?  Food TV watching therapy.

Okay, done with the rant.  As I stated I do love Ina and her more inexpensive recipes.  Well, that is an unfair statement.  I am sure I would LOVE her recipes that cost a hundred bucks to prepare.  Once again I digress. Last week I saw her make something very simple, yet elegant.  And since I had all the ingredients on hand I thought I would give it a whirl.  Speaking of having all the ingredients in the pantry, don’t ya just love that?  I mean, don’t you really find that one of life’s little pleasures is to see a recipe, whether in a magazine, a cookbook or on TV, want to make it, head to the kitchen, open the cupboard and lo and behold everything is there.  No making of lists, no trip to the market, no forgetting about it because you don’t have what it takes to make it.  Life can be very good some days. 

White Chocolate Bark adapted from Ina Garten, Barefoot Contessa

Ingredients

•1/2 cup walnuts

•16 ounces very good white chocolate, finely chopped

•1/4 cup dried cranberries

•1/4 cup medium-diced apricots.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Using a pencil, draw an 8 by 10-inch rectangle on a piece of parchment paper placed on a sheet pan. (I found this totally unnecessary, just spread it out evenly.) Turn the parchment paper over so the pencil mark doesn't get into the chocolate.

Place the walnuts in 1 layer on another sheet pan and bake for 8 minutes. (If you have a toaster oven, put the walnuts on a tray and toast on medium light, way easier). Set aside to cool and then chop roughly into large pieces.

Place 3/4 of the chocolate in a glass bowl and place it in the microwave on high power for 30 seconds. Stir with a rubber spatula. Put it back in the microwave for another 30 seconds and stir again. Continue to heat and stir every 30 seconds until the chocolate is just melted. Immediately, add the remaining chocolate and allow it to sit at room temperature, stirring often, until it's completely smooth. (If you need to heat it a little more, place it in the microwave for another 15 seconds at a time.) (Okay, I found this all silly.  I put all the chocolate in the microwave at the same time. I nuked it for one minute, it was not melted yet.  Then I nuked it for one more minute. Not all of it melted but as it sat for a few seconds and I began to stir, it melted beautifully.  But, you really do have to watch it carefully.)

Pour the melted chocolate onto the parchment paper and spread it lightly into the drawn rectangle.

Sprinkle the top evenly with the cooled walnuts, the cranberries and apricots.

Final Thoughts:

I honestly don’t know what I was thinking when I was sort of insinuating that this recipe is not an expensive one.  I think it was because I had all (4!) the ingredients in the cupboard. This is pricey.  I happened to have four-4 ounce Ghirardelli white chocolate bars (what for, I haven’t a clue) and big bags of dried apricots, dried cranberries and walnuts that I bought at Costco..  But, I am thinking that the bars had to be over 2 bucks a piece, and if you can’t shop at Costco, and had to buy the dried fruit and walnuts at your local market, this is super expensive. 

See?  This is probably why Ina’s recipes are so good.  It is because they are super pricey.  But, folks, having said that, this is really good.  I mean really really really good.  So, if you are like I am, and happened to have the stuff already, go ahead and make this.  It would be great for a super elegant treat.

Oh, one more thing, as long as I am complaining here, what person has room to put a large baking sheet in their fridge? Of course, Ina has multiple refrigerators and a staff that must move stuff in and out and clean it too.  I had a hell of a time trying to manage this cookie sheet in my fridge.  I looked to see if anything could be thrown out, and lo and behold, there was nothing.  Everything was good.  Now how did that happen?  I must have cleaned the fridge recently and not remembered!  Don’t laugh, you, too, will be old someday and not remember.  In the immortal or mortal words of Barbara Bush, I don’t want to clutter my beautiful mind.  So I promptly forget anything that is not important.  And most things that are.

If you’ve got a few extra bucks, make this.  You will really love it and impress all who you share with.  Oh, and this is extremely rich, so a little bit goes a long way.  Enjoy!